Ideas That I Think Are Better Than National HealthcareAugust 7, 2009
If you have never read this blog, seen my tweets, see the graphics on the sidebar, see the banner up there or know me at all, then you may not know how against Obamacare I really am. Its a horrible idea. How much do I despise this idea of socialized medicine you may ask? Well I will list some ideas that I think are better than its propsal. Remember this list is of things that ARE BETTER than nationalized healthcare.
1. Cleaning your bathroom with the door shut and a huge bucket of ammonia and bleach.
2. Asking a group of black football players if they know where the white supremecy rally is.
3. Calling the FBI and asking if anyone there knows the easiest way to build a bomb.
4. Go swimming in shark infested waters with huge bloody gashes on your body.
5. Putting a sign up in your front yard with your alarm code and a spare key taped to.
6. Spending the night alone, with no cell phone or lights of any kind, in the Waverly Hills sanatorium.
7. Going up to a cop in a police car and asking if he’d like to have sex for $500 or buy the pound of cocaine I have in my car or maybe a stolen gun from the trunk
8. Giving an infant a spray bottle of cleaner, a basket of rocks, and an open bottle of morphine pills to play with as you leave them alone to go the store.
9. Driving 10 mph in the fast lane on the 5 in the Los Angeles.
10. Deciding that watching the category 5 hurricane that is headed directly for your house from a lawnchair on the roof would be awesome.
11. Yelling on plane “has anyone seen a remote detinator for a bomb? I lost it!!!”
12. Going to the zoo with a couple of steaks in your bag and deciding to jump the guardrail to give them to the tigers since they looked hungry.
13. Riding in a car with Ted Kennedy, Lindsay Lohan, or Paris Hilton.
14. Cooking with grease in the kitchen when suddenly it catches fire, so you pour water on it.
And last but not by any means last (and my favorite)
15. Go to a pep rally on the University of Michigan campus wearing an Ohio State hat, an Ohio state jersey, an Ohio State necklace, Ohio State earrings, Ohio State socks, and Ohio State shoes then calling
your all of your best friends and telling them to call every 3 minutes after changing your ringtone to “We Don’t Give A Damn About The Whole State of Michigan” all on the day of the Ohio State v. Michigan game.
All of these are extremely bad ideas and most if not all would cause bodily harm, yet still in my opinion are smarter, more efficient, with minimal if not no cost, and safer than the proposed Obamacare bill.
National Socialized Healthcare controlled and run by Barack H. Soetoro Obama is definitely not the worst idea, but it dangerously close to it.